Just done surviving a really tough week and I felt like having a long break in life already. I'm a sad kid.
Anyway, this week, its all about studying, preparing for assignments, rushing homework, exam-ing and managing relationship.

A frouple relationship lol friend + couple haha

I'm still in awe with myself being able to confront him just like that. Ended things just like that. Just because I started noticing that conversation are getting colder and briefer. The reluctance in chatting and messaging. The difference in emotions when we sometimes meet, although he caught me staring at him for quite a number of times.

And then, I decided to go cold too.  I'd been feeling hurt for all these weeks. I know you are too, but I definitely don't know why, I'm not a mind reader. I thought you'd realize but you didn't and instead I was wrong.

I'm sorry for hurting you. 

Things got so complicated and I thought, "Let's end this." And I sent that long message to him. I remembered he told me before to not send him long messages because he hated it, that was back when we're Form 5. I guess he forgotten? He replied with a longer message haha. I was surprised.
I was actually hoping that he would say stuffs like just stay, wait for me till I'm prepared, an apology or something.

But scenarios like that only happens in movies. 

Instead its a really long message of "you said it like it was only you that made the effort.", "I'm tired", "I'm hurt too".
I'm sorry. 
 I realized I was wrong too. For hanging on to you for so long.
"Hugs? Meeting up with you?" blah blah blah
So, all these time, those were just guiltless flirting? For you to relieve your boredom? I thought it was for real. And I honestly hoped that you were serious back to those times and things are different now because everything had changed. When I read your message saying that you never had the intention of beginning a new relationship, why do you have to make it like we're for real? I'm sorry but, its just really hard for me to accept this.

You probably had no idea how much I felt like I'd been used. To add salt to the wound, you're my first love.
But I'm the one saying sorry here, haha. I'm such a stupid girl. I just lost a really close person whom I shared about my daily encounters every single day.

I shouldn't be so naive. But its okay, I learnt my lesson.

Anyway, I spent the week finishing up homework which just piles up day by day, so now I have 10 maths assessments accumulated in my bag and there is a Maths test and oral presentation on Tuesday.
I'm emphasizing this haha :P
I just finished doing my slides tho, and I should be proceeding to the script soon, but Maths homework looks tempting. I mean, 10+ assessments not done and there's test?

I should be studying haha

Oh and Economics test was like a war zone - a war between me and my pen. Only an hour to finish 15 MCQs and 3 essay questions consisting 10 graphs ( law of demand, law of supply, shift in both curves, movements, differences, expected curve to result after a situation, etc). And the marks are a killer! One missing detail on the graph and there goes one mark and all your effort of drawing it! So, if I missed out a detail in all 10 graphs, I'll lost 10 marks and my poor efforts T.T

When Ms. Pratiba announced that there was only 5 more minutes for answering the questions, I still had 3 more graphs to go.
Aaaaaaand I did the impossible! I did 3 graphs in 5 minutes!!
Best life achievement for the week!!! hahaha

But then, teacher,
Why you gotta be so cruel~? T.T

Maths test will be the same too, there will be drawing graphs and solving trigonometry questions.
ahhhh,
Jia you <3